How do I put all these thoughts into words?
After a few months of not puking even after bingeing.. I caved in.
I feel powerless, useless and worthless.
Like I can’t do anything right. Anything at all.
I’m a bad student, bad daughter, bad granddaughter, bad sister, bad friend, bad girlfriend..
Since when did I become like this?!
Because I refuse. I REFUSE to allow people who are assholes and full of themselves to take away my smile. I want to laugh and smile at every single fucking opportunity I can. While I still can.
I’ll never be as young as I am right now.
Go on, I dare you. I can see you looking at me the way you are, just like that. What are you going to do with it then? Yes I’m challenging you; look at me standing here, I’m not budging, it’s your move. I’m an elven Liv Tyler steeling against a wraith—if you want me, you can come and claim me. I’m not even packing Hobbit over here, I’m just waiting casually for you to cross whatever obstacle you see in your path. See, I’m tired of touching your thigh just this way, or placing my hand over yours just so; I want you to romance me.
Now you know I’m not one for gender stereotypes, I’ve asked guys out in the past and I’ll do it again. I’ve paid for their drinks and their dinners and I don’t care. I’ve changed their light globes. I’ve been strong for them…
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